yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
