It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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