Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
