Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
