Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
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