Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize