What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize