Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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