and she was petting her beer can
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
