u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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