So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Randomize
