no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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