Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize