Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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