sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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