Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
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