You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
