And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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