Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
Randomize
