She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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