well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
