Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize