Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize