She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
