So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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