Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
