People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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