I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Randomize
