Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
