no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
