Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Randomize
