The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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