Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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