Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Randomize
