I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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