By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Randomize
