the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Randomize
