Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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