I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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