community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
