im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
