her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
