My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
There's even glitter on my cock...
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize