first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Randomize
