I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Randomize
