I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
All the doctor said was why
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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