I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
