Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
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