I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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