D3 body, D1 cock
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
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